Gary Lineker “That was the action from the 4th team game and welcome back to the studio for the preview of the 2s game against Cambridge City 4s. What are your thoughts Alan.

Alan Hansen “Well, Captain Dean has had to ring the changes this week with so many of his old guard unavailable. Donnelly’s gout has flared up, Smith J has a broken knee and Brookes is dropping his daughter off at Uni. He’s really picked a very young side. I think I mentioned before you’ll win nothing with kids! It’ll be interesting to see how they get on. This team has really gone from copious application of Deep Heat and medication before games to barely shaving!

GL “thanks Al, let’s go over to Bishop and the late, great John Motson, afternoon Motty”

JM “ thanks Gary, welcome to a blustery and slightly damp Bishop for this afternoon’s clash. The pitch is playing quite slow and that should favour the visitors, who look quite experienced in their red tops, blue shorts and red stockings and will be attacking to school field end. Kettering, in their PSG inspired navy tops with maroon and white trim, navy shorts and navy stockings will attack the shed end. Umpire Tanser blows the whistle and we are away.
City start the game strongly pinning Kettering back in their defensive third but don’t seem to be making any real inroads or creating anything of note. Kettering now seem to have a foothold in the game and have forced a short corner. Mills, good save by the keeper, any thought Ally?
Ally McCoist (the hardest working pundit ever on co comms ) “ The big man would’ve been disappointed to concede there. It was at a good height for him”
JM “Kettering are still probing away but seem a bit off the pace and they do miss the influence of Brookes in midfield”
AM “aye, the big man’s a big miss for sure”
JM “ City have forced a short corner and it’s a goal. Bottom corner. Kettering’s makeshift defensive unit looked at sixes and sevens”
AM “poor. Should do better. They’ve had all week to work on that on the training ground.”
JM “and that’s half time here at Bishop, back to the studio”

GL “ well not much in that, how do you see the second half going Al”
AH “you’ll win nothing with kids”
GL “ thanks, it’ll be interesting to hear what the coach said at half time”

Jamie Smith (Kettering’s not coach) “we told the lads to take some responsibility for their own performance. No big names to rely on today. Keep taking the game to City”

JM “ Kettering start the second half strongly and are controlling possession much better. There seems more of a snap about them. They’re not letting City have any time on the ball”
AM “definitely a step up on the first half”
JM “ just lacking that final ball or composure in the finish. Tatty has had half a chance but blazed wide. City have created a couple of opportunities but extreme veteran keeper Barry has not really been troubled. It looks like Tatty’s joining that City player for a two minute sit down.”
AM “the hosts just seem unable to find the end result their approach play deserves.”
JM “and there goes the final whistle. Kettering will be disappointed not to have taken anything from the game but are better off than they were last season with three points from two games, Gary…”

GL “this league looks wide open this season Al, any thoughts”
AH “ well, despite my earlier remarks Kettering can be well pleased with this performance. The youngsters did terrifically well against wily opponents. I think their #safebyChristmas should be attainable and who knows they might push on to emulate last year’s third spot in the league.”